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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:17:19 PM EDT
I haven't posted in some time, for reasons obvious below.
Some of you may remember this picture, it's appeared here a few times, to various comments. It's my daughter Emily. She got a kick over the pic showing up here, and I always asked her permission if I saw it and wanted to comment in the thread it was in. 
She died on November 12, 2012. We don't know why, the coroners report has still not been released, but suspect a heart arythmia based on the reported symptoms. I am still destroyed. If not for her brother and sisters, I would have probably had to sell all my guns to reduce the temptation to... Well best not to go there. Thanksgiving was a nightmare. Christmas at the in laws was good for my wife and family, but still a hell for me. I miss her every day, and cry just about every day. My religious beliefs have been sorely challenged. How can God take this sweet child and let monsters still walk the earth. However I do believe in an afterlife, and pray to God to shepherd her soul. Those who post here that there is nothing beyond this life; I defy you to hold to that thesis after losing a child. It's been a hard few months. Emily's sister fell in September and shattered her backbone; she is mostly fully recovered with a fist full of Ti-6-4 in her back, but it was touch and go for about three weeks. After Emily's death three friends and acquaintances died by their own hands, leaving teenage children behind in each case, and me in a state of shock. I used to keep to the mantra that hard work and clean living ensured that things generally work out for the best. Now I'm not sure what to hold to. I find myself entering a panic attack each time the phone rings from one of my kids, in fear that some fresh hell is about to be visited upon them and me. "Hello" has been replaced with "is everything okay" as my default greeting. I worry constantly about them when they are away. I know this is irrational, but cannot shake it. Anyway, thats where I am now. If you have kids, even adult ones, take every opportunity to tell them you love them, even when they say hurtful things, or frustrate you in some way. Hourglassing. |
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WA, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:19:45 PM EDT
[#1]
Oh no...I lost my sister in a similar way. So so fucked up.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:20:12 PM EDT
[#2]
Thank you for posting this. Stay strong.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:20:35 PM EDT
[#3]
Wow. I have no words.
My own personal hell began on November 13th, but it has nothing on yours. Sorry. 
I'm not religious, but reading the book of Job has given me some perspective. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:20:49 PM EDT
[#4]
i'm so sorry. felt emotional just reading this. i will certainly focus on your advice.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:21:25 PM EDT
[#5]
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:22:05 PM EDT
[Last Edit: justsayin]
[#6]
Prayer sent. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:22:09 PM EDT
[#7]
I am so sorry man.
My daughter is 17 and if something happened to her I would be devastated. I always liked her pic showing up too, it was funny. |
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AZ, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:23:03 PM EDT
[#8]
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I have a (mid-twenties) Daughter and an (early twenties) Son. I tell them I love them every single day realizing that it would only take a second and one of them could be gone. |
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OH, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:23:20 PM EDT
[#9]
Sorry for your loss man. I cannot imagine your heartache.Prayers sent.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:23:42 PM EDT
[#10]
sorry for your lose OP, I am not a parent, yet, and cannot imagine that kind of pain. so sorry
hug your family and tell them you love em folks |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:24:06 PM EDT
[#11]
God bless you and your family....I'm very saddened to hear of your loss
Words cannot express what I feel for you man....be strong for your family brother...it's all we can do. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:24:45 PM EDT
[#12]
You have my heartfelt condolences. May she rest in peace.
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IL, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:24:48 PM EDT
[#13]
sorry for your loss, hang in there brother.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:25:01 PM EDT
[#14]
I am so sorry for your loss.........
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USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:25:28 PM EDT
[#15]
Originally Posted By hourglassing:
I haven't posted in some time, for reasons obvious below. Some of you may remember this picture, it's appeared here a few times, to various comments. It's my daughter Emily. She got a kick over the pic showing up here, and I always asked her permission if I saw it and wanted to comment in the thread it was in. http://i1311.photobucket.com/albums/s672/hourglassing/30bfcd682c0c3b68412705e7bd032614.jpg She died on November 12, 2012. We don't know why, the coroners report has still not been released, but suspect a heart arythmia based on the reported symptoms. I am still destroyed. If not for her brother and sisters, I would have probably had to sell all my guns to reduce the temptation to... Well best not to go there. Thanksgiving was a nightmare. Christmas at the in laws was good for my wife and family, but still a hell for me. I miss her every day, and cry just about every day. My religious beliefs have been sorely challenged. How can God take this sweet child and let monsters still walk the earth. However I do believe in an afterlife, and pray to God to shepherd her soul. Those who post here that there is nothing beyond this life; I defy you to hold to that thesis after losing a child. It's been a hard few months. Emily's sister fell in September and shattered her backbone; she is mostly fully recovered with a fist full of Ti-6-4 in her back, but it was touch and go for about three weeks. After Emily's death three friends and acquaintances died by their own hands, leaving teenage children behind in each case, and me in a state of shock. I used to keep to the mantra that hard work and clean living ensured that things generally work out for the best. Now I'm not sure what to hold to. I find myself entering a panic attack each time the phone rings from one of my kids, in fear that some fresh hell is about to be visited upon them and me. "Hello" has been replaced with "is everything okay" as my default greeting. I worry constantly about them when they are away. I know this is irrational, but cannot shake it. Anyway, thats where I am now. If you have kids, even adult ones, take every opportunity to tell them you love them, even when they say hurtful things, or frustrate you in some way. Hourglassing. I am so sorry for your loss. IM me if you need anything.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:25:49 PM EDT
[#16]
Oh my God...
My heart breaks for your loss. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:25:55 PM EDT
[#17]
Great Picture.
I'm sorry for your loss. |
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USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:25:56 PM EDT
[#18]
RIP Emily. |
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MI, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:26:03 PM EDT
[#19]
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:26:28 PM EDT
[#20]
As a father of two, I can't begin to imagine what you are going through.
Strength and Peace |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:26:41 PM EDT
[#21]
Heartbreaking. I'm so sorry.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:26:44 PM EDT
[#22]
Prayers uploaded for you. So sorry for your loss.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:26:50 PM EDT
[#23]
Wow
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PA, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:27:47 PM EDT
[#24]
Originally Posted By hourglassing: Can't offer much in the way of consolation other than to say...that f'n sucks. :( And, thank you for the oft needed reminder to take advantage of the opportunities we have today with our loved ones. Keep the faith.I haven't posted in some time, for reasons obvious below. Some of you may remember this picture, it's appeared here a few times, to various comments. It's my daughter Emily. She got a kick over the pic showing up here, and I always asked her permission if I saw it and wanted to comment in the thread it was in. http://i1311.photobucket.com/albums/s672/hourglassing/30bfcd682c0c3b68412705e7bd032614.jpg She died on November 12, 2012. We don't know why, the coroners report has still not been released, but suspect a heart arythmia based on the reported symptoms. I am still destroyed. If not for her brother and sisters, I would have probably had to sell all my guns to reduce the temptation to... Well best not to go there. Thanksgiving was a nightmare. Christmas at the in laws was good for my wife and family, but still a hell for me. I miss her every day, and cry just about every day. My religious beliefs have been sorely challenged. How can God take this sweet child and let monsters still walk the earth. However I do believe in an afterlife, and pray to God to shepherd her soul. Those who post here that there is nothing beyond this life; I defy you to hold to that thesis after losing a child. It's been a hard few months. Emily's sister fell in September and shattered her backbone; she is mostly fully recovered with a fist full of Ti-6-4 in her back, but it was touch and go for about three weeks. After Emily's death three friends and acquaintances died by their own hands, leaving teenage children behind in each case, and me in a state of shock. I used to keep to the mantra that hard work and clean living ensured that things generally work out for the best. Now I'm not sure what to hold to. I find myself entering a panic attack each time the phone rings from one of my kids, in fear that some fresh hell is about to be visited upon them and me. "Hello" has been replaced with "is everything okay" as my default greeting. I worry constantly about them when they are away. I know this is irrational, but cannot shake it. Anyway, thats where I am now. If you have kids, even adult ones, take every opportunity to tell them you love them, even when they say hurtful things, or frustrate you in some way. Hourglassing. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:28:07 PM EDT
[#25]
You are in my prayers brother. Hang in there.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:28:14 PM EDT
[#26]
So sorry for you and your family. I hope you can find some peace.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:28:16 PM EDT
[#27]
Very sorry for your loss. Please stay strong.
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MO, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:28:34 PM EDT
[#28]
I am sooooo sorry for your loss, as a father of three children I cannoth imagine the pain you are feeling.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:28:47 PM EDT
[#29]
Damn, really sorry for your loss.
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MD, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:29:04 PM EDT
[#30]
I am sorry for your loss.
I lost my nephew, who I was very close with, 2 years ago. You and your family is in my thoughts. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:29:31 PM EDT
[#31]
Words can't express what you are going through or how bad I feel for you. Try to be strong for the rest of the family, cherish the memories, your angel is in a great place.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:30:08 PM EDT
[#32]
I remember well when you first posted that pic. I am just devastated for you.
For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. I Corinthians 13:12 Prayers outbound for you and your family. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:30:49 PM EDT
[#33]
I am so sorry for your loss.
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IA, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:31:55 PM EDT
[#34]
Wow.... kudos to you. You will be in our prayers. Stay strong!
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:33:17 PM EDT
[#35]
I will have you in my thoughts. If its ok with you, I want to send this to my parents. They are far better people than me, and they're thoughts and prayers would be worth far more than mine.
That is horrible, I am so sorry for your loss. I remember that thread. Your daughter reminds me of the little sister of one of my best friends. I do not know if I would know what to say to her if she lost her little sister.
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CT, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:34:20 PM EDT
[#36]
That's sad, I'm sorry for your loss of your beautiful daughter.
Had a bad year myself. Lost my brother in April, and then my Dad in November. But I can't imagine what it would be like to lose a kid. My sincere condolences. Hang in there. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:34:23 PM EDT
[#37]
You have my condolences and prayers. |
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FL, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:34:41 PM EDT
[#38]
Very Sorry. Your heart will begin to heal one day. These are very long days when you are hurting. Prayers for your family and you.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:35:00 PM EDT
[#39]
i'm so sorry something so awful has happened to you
i remember seeing that pic a while back and getting a chuckle out of it. just fucking terrible and not fair |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:35:18 PM EDT
[#40]
I am so sorry for your loss. I have three kids and cannot imagine the pain of losing one of them. My heart aches for you and your family.
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FL, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:35:58 PM EDT
[#41]
you are in my thoughts and prayers.I lost my son in 1993 and was told that it never gets better but it will get easier. they were right. Stay strong .
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:36:39 PM EDT
[#42]
My deepest condolences hourglassing, I'm so very sorry for your family's loss.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:36:46 PM EDT
[#43]
Very, very sorry for your and your families loss. Stay strong and relie on your beliefs. Remember we were never promised a easy walk along this path, just that we would never have to walk alone.
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USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:37:07 PM EDT
[#44]
Prayers for you.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:37:21 PM EDT
[#45]
I am so sorry man. I don't have the words.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:37:35 PM EDT
[#46]
You have surely gone through hell on earth these last months. I don't know how you have the strength even to tell us about all the devastation that has befallen your family.
I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter. I will be praying for her, for you and for the rest of your family. |
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TX, USA
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:37:52 PM EDT
[#47]
Originally Posted By hourglassing:
I haven't posted in some time, for reasons obvious below. Some of you may remember this picture, it's appeared here a few times, to various comments. It's my daughter Emily. She got a kick over the pic showing up here, and I always asked her permission if I saw it and wanted to comment in the thread it was in. http://i1311.photobucket.com/albums/s672/hourglassing/30bfcd682c0c3b68412705e7bd032614.jpg She died on November 12, 2012. We don't know why, the coroners report has still not been released, but suspect a heart arythmia based on the reported symptoms. I am still destroyed. If not for her brother and sisters, I would have probably had to sell all my guns to reduce the temptation to... Well best not to go there. Thanksgiving was a nightmare. Christmas at the in laws was good for my wife and family, but still a hell for me. I miss her every day, and cry just about every day. My religious beliefs have been sorely challenged. How can God take this sweet child and let monsters still walk the earth. However I do believe in an afterlife, and pray to God to shepherd her soul. Those who post here that there is nothing beyond this life; I defy you to hold to that thesis after losing a child. It's been a hard few months. Emily's sister fell in September and shattered her backbone; she is mostly fully recovered with a fist full of Ti-6-4 in her back, but it was touch and go for about three weeks. After Emily's death three friends and acquaintances died by their own hands, leaving teenage children behind in each case, and me in a state of shock. I used to keep to the mantra that hard work and clean living ensured that things generally work out for the best. Now I'm not sure what to hold to. I find myself entering a panic attack each time the phone rings from one of my kids, in fear that some fresh hell is about to be visited upon them and me. "Hello" has been replaced with "is everything okay" as my default greeting. I worry constantly about them when they are away. I know this is irrational, but cannot shake it. Anyway, thats where I am now. If you have kids, even adult ones, take every opportunity to tell them you love them, even when they say hurtful things, or frustrate you in some way. Hourglassing. You will see her again. Point others to the Truth what years you have left for them to see her as well, for eternity, where death is dead and you live in glory with your Maker, and daughter, forever. I lost my father a few years ago. And he was 54. It doesn't quite compare but I understand loss. Death dies in Christ. It does not have the final say. Grieve where appropriate. There are people here who love you much. |
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:37:56 PM EDT
[#48]
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:38:10 PM EDT
[#49]
That's so horrible. I don't have the words.
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Posted: 1/27/2013 9:38:31 PM EDT
[#50]
OP, my sincere condolences. I can't even imagine, that picture says a lot about her and you. I hope I can raise my daughter like that. She's 16 months old right now. |
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